There is no clear consensus on a single definition or approach to reconciliation. The concept is fluid and ambiguous, with multiple & complex cultural, social, political & economic nuances. There is also a degree of tension—& even paradox—at its heart. Elites often frame reconciliation discourse rather than the broader population. However, reconciliation is a deeply personal, multi-layered endeavor that can—& often needs—to be both bottom-up & top-down. The very act of reconciliation involves trying to live with the ambiguity of how multiple things can be true at once. It may also be an inherently fleeting phenomenon, a kind of horizon that can be seen but not touched.

There are several misconceptions & dangers related to understanding reconciliation. Despite some of the ways in which it has been conceptualized & put into practice, reconciliation is not a discrete moment that happens and endures. It is a process & not a linear one. It is also more emotional & creative than technical. There is also a danger of seeing reconciliation as an ultimate cure when in fact, the pain & suffering caused by conflict may be something that people have to learn to live with & mitigate for the rest of their lives.

All of this means that in certain cases, ex-combatants, affected populations & reconciliation practitioners in various post-conflict settings may find it more helpful not to use the term reconciliation, at least initially. While overly simplifying or essentializing reconciliation is counter-productive & problematic, several paradigms have tried to distill its key aspects. Among them, there is a series of commonalities that most researchers & practitioners would probably agree on:

• Reconciliation is a means by which a society or community transitions from a divided past to a shared future.
• It involves the rebuilding of trust & social relationships.
• It is a long-term process, sometimes over generations.
• It cannot be imposed, only chosen.
• It operates across at least five different social strata: political society, institutional, community, interpersonal & individual.